IF I’VE LEARNED ONE THING the last several months – missing someone, pining away for someone, is a waste of time and energy. At least the way I and most people really miss someone. For most people, including myself, when you’re really missing someone, or even some thing, that’s a source of sadness. You get out of bed in the morning and that feeling hits – that person is gone, for good. You wonder what they’re doing, who they’re with. You recall good times, or are reminded of them in different ways. That feeling – morning, afternoon or evening – that feeling of emptiness and sadness sucks, bigly.
Another, better way to look at it though, is summed up perfectly by Charles Grodin in one of the greatest scenes from the TV series Louie. “The bad part is when you forget her, when you don’t care about her…enjoy the heartbreak while you can…” In other words, it’s when you miss someone it’s the realization how much they meant, that you should be lucky you had the opportunity to feel that, to be with that person, to have them in your life. I love that idea, and it’s a far better outlook when you have a loss – whether its the end of a relationship, or even a death of a loved one. That outlook can help get to what can be the hardest place to arrive at: acceptance.